I n t e r t w i n e d
The idea of rescuing life, always triggers the question of worth. The Germans, except Ferdinand von Schirach, agree that human dignity is inviolable. But, why?
I still shiver everytime I see the helicopter of the hospital where I work in landing upon the rooftop. It makes a very big noise and it wasted a lot of environment-unfriendly gas just to rescue one person. One single human body. Or when an ambulance drive through the town with an unimaginable speed. The emergency doctors and nurses would then be gathered at once. When the patient enters the room, things would begin to move fast, hectic but also structured and people would talk only when needed. Every second counts in that room. My job was, at first, to stay at the corner at the room, keeping my mouth shut and just do nothing. The first step is always observing.
It was in the time of observing can you really see what's going on and what's worth to focus on. My first day in the emergency room forced me to think of the worth of the human body lying on the operating table. A bike accident left him with an extreme shock; his eyes were open and teary, stared to nothing. No open traumas, but he couldn't say a single word. And while the doctors were discussing the diagnoses and the nurses were preparing the man for CT and all, I thought about something else: what has this guy done so much for life that he should be given the privilege to be rescued?
Some hours later I visited him and checked his vital signs. He was then calmed down. A man in his 70s, owned no family or friends who we can call to inform about the accident. His will to live, was probably the priority not only for him, but also to the medical workers. The respect from the medical workers towards his will should make it clear that one's life doesn't only consist of the physical body, but also one's feelings and ways of thinking. The consideration of the three aspects should result in respecting life as a whole.
The discussion gets more challenging when the tree aspects fail to synchronize, to be understood. Life's meaning has already blurred, but some situations can really make you blind. If this happens, do we still need to try to save lives?
So far, my longest night shift was when I have to keep guard an old schizophrenic and suicidal lady. She cursed a lot on me and the voices inside her head and when she didn't, she tried to jump out the window. The sleeping medicaments didn't work.
It all started when the husband died, the other nurse told me. Then she started having these suicidal thoughts and hallucinations. She was cachectic and also suffers from a lot of other severe lung diseases. "Tell me one reason, good enough, for me to stay alive. Just one, Schwester," she said. I can't remember what I answered, but it didn't satisfy her. She forgot my answer some seconds later, then asked me the same question. I gave her another answer, tried my luck. But that also didn't work. This repeated. Her question attacked me again and again as I tried to keep my eyes open. After 3 hours, a young psychiatrist and a nurse came to the room, told me that my shift is over and that they would take it from there.
The question still hung on my head when I got home that morning and after I woke up around afternoon. What answer would be satisfying enough for her? Is it more about the answer, or more about how we give them the answer? When people don't have any reason to live anymore, why do we try to keep them alive? For whom do we do the things that we do? What drives us?
Since working in this field, the urge to be able to answer these questions got even bigger. Simply because it would mean a lot to me to really understand and agreeing to what I am doing. I am not really sure if what I am going to say next could be understood the way I want it to be but hey let me try: as mentioned above, I would like to see life as a combination of three main aspects: body, mind and soul which play in an endless exchange-game and the balance is the goal of that game. Every aspect is built of more little aspects that are scattered in our daily lives and we're picking them up along our ways. Therefore, meaning of life varies, it depends on experiences and feelings, which are personal. But we all share one thing in common; we all are social beings. Thus, it is unavoidable that we influence and construct each other's meaning of life. I guess that's what makes helping worth it.
P.S. The two stories mentioned above are real with just a little bit of alteration.
I still shiver everytime I see the helicopter of the hospital where I work in landing upon the rooftop. It makes a very big noise and it wasted a lot of environment-unfriendly gas just to rescue one person. One single human body. Or when an ambulance drive through the town with an unimaginable speed. The emergency doctors and nurses would then be gathered at once. When the patient enters the room, things would begin to move fast, hectic but also structured and people would talk only when needed. Every second counts in that room. My job was, at first, to stay at the corner at the room, keeping my mouth shut and just do nothing. The first step is always observing.
It was in the time of observing can you really see what's going on and what's worth to focus on. My first day in the emergency room forced me to think of the worth of the human body lying on the operating table. A bike accident left him with an extreme shock; his eyes were open and teary, stared to nothing. No open traumas, but he couldn't say a single word. And while the doctors were discussing the diagnoses and the nurses were preparing the man for CT and all, I thought about something else: what has this guy done so much for life that he should be given the privilege to be rescued?
Some hours later I visited him and checked his vital signs. He was then calmed down. A man in his 70s, owned no family or friends who we can call to inform about the accident. His will to live, was probably the priority not only for him, but also to the medical workers. The respect from the medical workers towards his will should make it clear that one's life doesn't only consist of the physical body, but also one's feelings and ways of thinking. The consideration of the three aspects should result in respecting life as a whole.
The discussion gets more challenging when the tree aspects fail to synchronize, to be understood. Life's meaning has already blurred, but some situations can really make you blind. If this happens, do we still need to try to save lives?
So far, my longest night shift was when I have to keep guard an old schizophrenic and suicidal lady. She cursed a lot on me and the voices inside her head and when she didn't, she tried to jump out the window. The sleeping medicaments didn't work.
It all started when the husband died, the other nurse told me. Then she started having these suicidal thoughts and hallucinations. She was cachectic and also suffers from a lot of other severe lung diseases. "Tell me one reason, good enough, for me to stay alive. Just one, Schwester," she said. I can't remember what I answered, but it didn't satisfy her. She forgot my answer some seconds later, then asked me the same question. I gave her another answer, tried my luck. But that also didn't work. This repeated. Her question attacked me again and again as I tried to keep my eyes open. After 3 hours, a young psychiatrist and a nurse came to the room, told me that my shift is over and that they would take it from there.
The question still hung on my head when I got home that morning and after I woke up around afternoon. What answer would be satisfying enough for her? Is it more about the answer, or more about how we give them the answer? When people don't have any reason to live anymore, why do we try to keep them alive? For whom do we do the things that we do? What drives us?
Since working in this field, the urge to be able to answer these questions got even bigger. Simply because it would mean a lot to me to really understand and agreeing to what I am doing. I am not really sure if what I am going to say next could be understood the way I want it to be but hey let me try: as mentioned above, I would like to see life as a combination of three main aspects: body, mind and soul which play in an endless exchange-game and the balance is the goal of that game. Every aspect is built of more little aspects that are scattered in our daily lives and we're picking them up along our ways. Therefore, meaning of life varies, it depends on experiences and feelings, which are personal. But we all share one thing in common; we all are social beings. Thus, it is unavoidable that we influence and construct each other's meaning of life. I guess that's what makes helping worth it.
P.S. The two stories mentioned above are real with just a little bit of alteration.
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